Letting Go
by Misha
Summary: Sometimes, you just have to let go.


Letting Go   
By Misha 

Disclaimer- I don't own either the song "Letting Go" or the characters of Days of Our Lives. They both belong to people with a lot more money of me and I'm not making money off this story, so please don't sue me. 

_Author's Notes- Alright, this is pretty angsty, but I'm in that kind of mood right now. I'm going through major writer's block on my longer stories, so for now, I'll probably be writing mostly short stories. I have quite a few song fic ideas floating through my head, so you can probably expect quite a few of those for various couples. This one is a Mason fic and it's set to "Letting Go" by Sozzi which is on the first Dawson's Creek Soundtrack. Well, that's all for now, enjoy!_

_Don't call me,   
Don't write,   
Don't show up in the middle night,   
You know that we needed some   
Time and space to breathe in._

Mimi ran her hands through her hair. "Don't do this." She told him. "Jase, if we're going to be apart. We're _going_ to be apart. Don't show up at my door like you always do. Don't call, don't write, just give me space. Okay?" 

Her ex-boyfriend stared at her with green eyes that used to make her melt. "You don't mean that, Meems." 

"Yeah," she said quietly, "I do. You called it off, Jase. Now let it be over. You were right, we need to be apart. So let us be." 

_I still recall the words you said to me, It's what you did not say that sets me free, Now how can I be so blind when you keep on coming back again? It's not okay for you to play this game of seesaw with my head._

"You always do this." She continued. "We break up, but then you show up at my door and I take you back. Then you end it again. It has to end." 

"Mimi." He said again. 

"No." She told him. "Don't. I've heard it all a million times before Jase, I don't want to hear it again. It's always the same thing and I'm sick of it. I'm done. I'm not playing this any more. I'm free, free of this damn seesaw that we call a relationship." 

_Now it hurts too much,   
And it hits too hard,   
And I won't play this part._

"Mimi," he began, "I love you." 

"I love you too, darling." She said, a touch of bitterness in her tone. "Though there are times, I wish to God I didn't. It hurts too much. Yeah, we've had good times, but you've hurt me more than anyone else ever has. And I'm done. I can't take any more heart break, so I'm getting out. I can't do this anymore, Jase. I'm sorry." 

_Don't call me,   
Don't write,   
Don't show up in the middle night,   
You know that we needed some   
Time and space to breathe in._

"I can't let you go." He told her quietly. 

"You already did." She said flatly, her green eyes meeting his. "You gave up your rights when you left. You have no right to come back whenever you feel like it and expect things to be the same."   


_So now I say the things I want to say, Sometimes it's better letting go this way,   
I'll always know down in my soul,   
We really had so far to go,   
I've given all I had to give,   
And now it's time for me to live._

"So what now?" He asked her finally. 

"Now we say goodbye." She told him softly. "And we begin to let go." 

"What if I can't?" He asked her. 

"Tough." She told him. "I've thought about this long and hard, Jase. Ever since the night you left. I knew that you'd come back eventually, like you alwasy do, and I knew that this time, I couldn't let you. This time I had to say goodbye." 

"Why?" He asked her quietly. "Why now?" 

"I think this has been coming for a long time." She told him. "I think, deep down, I knew, we both knew, that this wasn't a forever thing. Face it, we never shared the forever and always love that our friends do. We're not Shawn and Belle who have been in love since they were both in diapers. And we're not Phillip and Chloe, who have over-come any obstacle that stood in their path to be together. That's true love, what we had... It was fun. Yes, I loved you, but I always knew that eventually we'd part." 

Jason stared at her. "But I **do** love you." He protested. 

"And I love you." Mimi told him. "But can you honestly tell me that you couldn't live without me?" 

Jason was silent. 

"I thought so." She said with a smile. "I love you Jase, but... that's not enough for me. Not anymore. I've given this relationship my all, I don't have anything left to give it, so I know it's time to call it an end. I've been with you since I was 17 and the years have been good, it's been fun, but now... Now I get to live again. I get to be just me, with no one to hold me down, and I can't wait." 

_And I won't look back,   
And I won't regret,   
Thought it hurts like Hell,   
Some day I will forget._

"So this is it?" He asked quietly. 

"This is it." She confirmed. "After this, it's over. And I'm not going to look back. I'm moving on with my life with no regrets. No matter how much it hurts right now, I know it can't forever." 

"Are you sure?" He asked her softly. 

"I'm sure." She told him. "I'll get over it eventually and so will you. The pain will go away and we'll move on." 

_Don't call me,   
Don't write,   
Don't show up in the middle night,   
You know that we needed some   
Time and space to breathe in._

"It's gonna be hard to let you go." He told her softly. 

"I know." She said quietly. "For me to. I know that I'm gonna wake up in the middle of the night and reach for you and when your not there, I'm probably going to start crying. But only for a little while. And I do know that this is for the best. I need some time on my own. More than that, I need to **be** on my own. I need to find myself." 

"What do you mean?" Jason asked curiously. 

She smiled. "I've been part of Mimi and Jason for so long, that I've almost forgot what it's like to be just Mimi. I have to find that again." 

_Don't call me,   
Don't write,   
Don't show up in the middle night,   
To say that you've been thinkin'   
Because I know it's just the drink in you._

"I'm going to miss you." Jason told her, reaching out to run his fingers through her auburn coloured hair. 

"I'll miss you too." She whispered, catching his hand and holding in hers for a long moment. 

"But it's over?" He said quietly, phrasing it so it was almost a question. 

"Yeah, it's over." She confirmed, letting go of his hand. "We need to say goodbye. And we need to be apart." 

"You know there are times when that's going to be hard on me." He told her. "There are going to be times when I'll want nothing more than to show up on your doorstep like I always did." 

"Don't." She told him quietly. "I can't take it." 

"I know." He told her. "So I won't, but it's going to be Hell making sure I don't." 

_It's funny that we seem to end up here, I never thought I'd see this all disappear._

Mimi turned from Jason suddenly and looked over at a picture of them taken years ago. God, they had looked happy. 

"Things change, so much." She whispered. 

"Yeah," he agreed, "they do." 

They were both quiet for a minute, just looking at each other and wondering what had gone wrong. 

"You know, maybe I knew in my heart that it couldn't last, but... I still didn't really believe it would end." She confessed. 

"Me neither." He told her. "I never thought I'd lose you. But I did, didn't I?" 

"Yeah." She confirmed softly. "I guess you did." 

_Don't call me,   
Don't write,   
Don't show up in the middle night,   
You know that we needed some   
Time and space to breathe in._

"I should go." He said after a moment. 

"Yeah." She agreed. "I guess." 

He stood there for a long moment, just watching her. 

Their eyes met and for a moment she wanted to tell him to stay, that she had changed her mind. But she knew she couldn't. She knew that she needed this, that they needed this. 

Still, it was hard knowing that he left tonight, he wasn't coming back. 

Before she could stop herself, she stood on her tiptoes and leaned over and kissed him softly. It only lasted a minute and then they pulled away. 

"Goodbye." He told her quietly, as he turned towards the door and opened it. 

"Goodbye." She whispered as he walked out it. 

He was gone, it was over. 

_This is letting go,   
This is letting go,   
This is letting go,   
This is letting go._

She knew that she needed this. That she needed to let go. But it hurt. Oh, how it hurt. 

She looked over at the picture again and suddenly she was overwhelmed by memories. 

She had known Jason since she was a little girl, but she had never really liked him. He had picked on her since the time they were five. It had been the harmless kind though, he had just been a little boy who picked on a little girl by pulling her hair or stealing her dolls. Stuff like that. 

But when he got older, the teasing got nastier. Especially after he met Jan... 

God, after all these years, the name still made Mimi shudder. She had been a first class bitch and she had made Jason into a total jerk and almost caused him to lose all his friends. 

But, then one day, he had finally gotten a clue. He realised what a bitch Jan was and he dumped her. 

Once he was free of Jan, Jason turned out to be a pretty good guy and Mimi couldn't help, but fall for him. 

They started dating their senior high school and they were together on and off for the next seven years, now at twenty-four, she had to figure how to live without him. 

She doubted it would be easy. But she had to. She had to let go. 

More than that, she **wanted** to let go. 

_Don't call me,   
Don't write,   
It alright.   
Don't show up in the middle night,   
You know that we needed some   
Time and space to breathe in._

"I'll do it." She whispered. "It'll take time, but I'll do it. I'll move on. I'll let go." 

And she would. 

As long as Jason did what she asked. She needed to cut him out of her life completely, at least for now. maybe one day, they could be friends, but right now... 

Right now she needed to be free of him. She knew that the only way she would get over him was if he wasn't in her life. She knew if she saw him, talked to him, she'd want him back and that couldn't happen. 

Not now. She needed to be free. No matter how much it hurt. And she would be. 

She would move on, she would be free, she'd live again. 

Because she was letting go. 

The End


End file.
